I am a lesbian. I define lesbian as a woman who is romantically, emotionally(as in a friendship sort of way), physically, and sexually attracted to other women.
When it comes to men, I am physically, emotionally, and sexually attracted to them but not romantically. With guys I find them attractive but never do I find them mentally stimulating in a romantic way. I am friends with guys and I get along better with guys, but I just don’t feel any sort of romantic feeling there. I just don’t click with guys other than in friendships or fwb.
While I am a lesbian and I do believe in the possibility of me falling in love with a man. Do I think it is likely? No, not at all, but I believe anything is possible. If in the end I fall in love with a woman then I fall in love with a woman and if I end up falling in love with a man then I fall in love with a man.
I’m a lesbian but my heart, eyes, and mind are open. I know that anything is possible and nothing is just black and white in that way.
So why define myself as a lesbian? Because if I were to identify myself as bisexual or pansexual then it would seem that I know I am romantically interested in men and am open to a romantic relationship with one. Why define myself at all? Because it makes things simpler especially with sexuality. It’s a lot simpler to say “I’m a lesbian” than to sit there and say “I am a girl who likes girls in all ways and I am only really interested in men as friends or in a sexual way but not romantically like a relationship type of thing, though I am completely open to the fact that I could fall in love with a man and blah, blah, blah, etc.
I get a lot of questions about this so I figured I should just explain it already to the best of my ability. I would go further into it but I don’t want to take up a ton of room or anything like that so yeah. This is my definition of lesbian for myself. And yes, this is my definition for me. It doesn’t mean all lesbians feel this way or anything like that. This is just me.
*Edit: I’d also like to say that I am attracted to mtf and ftm and if you don’t identify as either gender or if you identify as both.